31 May 2013

this morning


It's just you and me today. Grass, gumboots and apple pieces; no plans. I peg out your nappies and you water the weeds peppering our easy silence with your melodious nattering.  The plane overhead catches your particular attention and you scrunch your nose at the sun's glare to catch a glimpse of it. The lawn needs mowing.

We share a milky cup of tea and I watch your hand on my knee. The dimples less defined now as the baby becomes a boy. Tethered by an invisible thread of knowing and love you never stray too far from my side returning often to "cuddle Mumma". Your tiny hands bear gifts of flowers, unripened tomatoes and stones. A butterfly dries it's wings on the stairs nearby and I breathe deeply to still my body and quell the riot in my mind.

There are swirling dreams to follow and mountains to conquer and  at times the responsibility of this role can stifle and hem me in. This simple path I tread squirms against societal expectations....it challenges my own. The yearning to do more, to be more. But when I wade through the sludge of to-do's and should-do's I find a calm. For now, I am all I need to be; your Mumma.

We make a cake for our honey girl and you eat the flour from the bowl. I smile at the lessen you have learnt and reward your curiosity with the battery spoon. A muddled day of porridge, one lost kindy shoe and washing up. An inward reflecting day. A slow and gentle day - just you and me.

Steph x


16 comments:

  1. beautiful. beautiful & wistful. just as it should be. xo

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  2. Oh so beautiful Steph. I just love how you capture each precious moment. xx

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  3. Beautiful Step. A perfect day. x

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  4. A perfect day in so many ways - you live in the now so well. I love that photo of the butterfly.

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  5. And I find a calm reading your words. x

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  6. Beautiful. Tears. Beautiful. And more tears.

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  7. Sigh. So beautiful Steph. The picture you paint with your words is always so beautiful (and photos to match), today I felt the rawness and honesty of being in the moment with your babe while parts of yourself yearn for other things too I think most mothers can relate to this. When I had my first baby and was fretting about being so surrendered to my baby as if my writing world would be lost forever, a wise older friend said to me "this time will enrich you in ways that you don't even know yet" I took a lot of comfort from her words. My friend was right and I thought you might like her words too. Have a beautiful weekend x

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  8. These days are the ones to treasure...they are so fleeting and the ones you will long for in years to come. I would love to have a you and me day with a curious little one again.

    Enjoy today! xo

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  9. I had an afternoon with my small boy today as his big sister was at nursery. Just lovely, I left behind a messy house in favor of a swing park and sharing tea and milk in a cafe together. You write so beautifully, lovely words and beautiful images as ever.

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  10. What a lovely post:) It is certainly 'enough' to be a mumma. The biggest most wonderful job on earth. x

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  11. I too look at the dimples in my son's hands and wonder at the change in him.

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  12. Wonderful details from your day, I share so many of these bittersweet emotions (and I also shared a batter covered spoon today :)).

    xox Lilly

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  13. I loved reading this and your photos are gorgeous! x

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  14. Treasure these days. They are far and few between. X

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Your words brighten my day! Thank-you so much for joining me on my adventure. x